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  • facebook, science puns, wordplay, jokes
  • pizza box, privacy, laptop
  • robot infantry soldier, terminator irl
  • meme, shipment, door bell rings, shit, wait all day
  • aint nobody got time for that, kiss every day, every hour, every minute
  • beer, bat tub, woman, perfect situation
  • punch you in the mouth, romantic
  • star wars, fast food, cosplay, costumes


  • to the people that complain that fast food looks better in advertisements than it does in reality, look at your profile picture then look in the mirror, ooooooh
  • we are running the most dangerous experiment in history right now, which is to see how much carbon dioxide the atmosphere can handle before there is an environmental catastrophe
  • how deep in the mid?, depends on who you ask, we all go through the same stuff differently
  • republicans are more afraid of the nra than they are of isis, political comic
  • a giraffe's coffee would be cold by the time it reached the bottom of its throat, ever think about that?, no you you only think about yourself
  • eating an after eight before eight, fuck the police
  • a short story about neck tattoos, wow what the fuck jenny
  • can't you see that my bowl is empty, angry dog standing like human


  • #55940

  • guy breaks up with random phone numbers via text and he gets amazing responses

  • 522 views
guy breaks up with random phone numbers via text and he gets amazing responses
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10 More
  • #56559

  • so i'm sitting with my son watching tv and he hears he got a text on his phone that he left in the kitchen so he goes and it's a text from me

    , please bring the chips and a diet pepsi on your way back
  • 1685 views
so i'm sitting with my son watching tv and he hears he got a text on his phone that he left in the kitchen so he goes and it's a text from me, please bring the chips and a diet pepsi on your way back
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  • #51599

  • guy tries to impress girls with beer bottle trick and breaks it on the pavement instead

    , fail
  • 1093 views
Your browser does not support HTML5 video.
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  • #49799

  • guy tries to rob a bank with a clever

    , gets laughed at and beat down
  • 504 views
Your browser does not support HTML5 video.
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  • #44569
  • i was waiting on the pizza delivery guy to call me to say my pizza is here
    , when my phone rang i accidentally answered with pizza? instead of hello and he replied yes this is pizza
  • 1056 views
i was waiting on the pizza delivery guy to call me to say my pizza is here, when my phone rang i accidentally answered with pizza? instead of hello and he replied yes this is pizza
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