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  • i explained gluten allergy to my grandmother and she sighed and told me that they ate leather belts during wwii to keep from starving, twitter
  • hermione i am gay, are you kidding me?, no i'm fucking sirius
  • when you open the blinds after staying up all night
  • please be safe, if you fall the animals could eat you and that might make them sick, thank you, sign, lol
  • dear atheists, thank you for not passing any discrimination hate laws this week, have a beer on me, god, twitter
  • dear kid who graffitied some cool ray bans and a mustache on me, i'm not even mad
  • i always start phone conversations with "my phone's about to die", just so people don't waste my time
  • i bought shoes from a drug dealer, i don't know what he laced them with but i've been tripping all day


  • somebody tell her, lady waiting in line with mannequins
  • excavator on steep embankment, unsafe work conditions
  • maybe my wife isn't paranoid after all, toddler trying to eat electric socket
  • the disease is gone, so my son is gonna by okay?, i just told you he's gone
  • resisting the urge to say sorry after someone says stop saying sorry
  • it's impossible to love someone and control them at the same time
  • harmacist, when you're playing as the medic but you have the most kills
  • cats, meme


  • #58024

  • the right to free speech means the government can't arrest you for what you say

    , it doesn't mean that anyone else has to listen to your bullshit, or host you while you share it
  • 2452 views
the right to free speech means the government can't arrest you for what you say, it doesn't mean that anyone else has to listen to your bullshit, or host you while you share it
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  • #60820

  • strange isn't it

    , you know yourself better than anyone else, yet you crumble at the words of someone who hasn't even lived a second of your life, focus on your own voice, it's the only one that matters
  • 1416 views
strange isn't it, you know yourself better than anyone else, yet you crumble at the words of someone who hasn't even lived a second of your life, focus on your own voice, it's the only one that matters
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  • #43031

  • first of all god doesn't hate gay people

    , god doesn't hate anyone, that's his whole thing, when a man dressed as satan speaks more accurately about god than your pastor, you know something is wrong
  • 3208 views
first of all god doesn't hate gay people, god doesn't hate anyone, that's his whole thing, when a man dressed as satan speaks more accurately about god than your pastor, you know something is wrong
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  • #60515

  • drink water from the spring where horses drink

    , the horse will never drink bad water, lay your bed where the cat sleeps, eat the fruit that has been touched by a worm
  • 1005 views
drink water from the spring where horses drink, the horse will never drink bad water, lay your bed where the cat sleeps, eat the fruit that has been touched by a worm
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  • #60316
  • being raised right doesn't mean you don't drink
    , party or smoke, being raised right is how you treat people, your manners and respect, keanu reeves
  • 615 views
being raised right doesn't mean you don't drink, party or smoke, being raised right is how you treat people, your manners and respect, keanu reeves
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