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(EXCLUDE NSFW CONTENT)
have you ever thought about how weird sleeping is
like we basically dress ourselves in special sleeping clothes and lay on special sleeping mats then spend the next few hours complete comatose all the while hallucinating vividly
concerned about who might be using a public restroom the same time as you?
you could avoid the situation all together by wearing adult diapers while you're out and about
especially since you're already behaving like a baby
i want a phone that looks like a pokedex
and instead of pokemon in the entries it will be all of my contacts
i wonder if any of them will mind giving me their height
weight and then yelling into it so i can record their cry
why is spicy the only flavor my butt can detect?
why can i eat pancakes and then 14 hours later be like
ooh pancakes again
i always was the nice and sweet guy who got friendzoned all the time
then i tried being an asshole for like 1 month
found a girlfriend