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  • everyone at my funeral gets a stun gun, the last one standing gets all my stuff
  • iowa corn isn't just for eating, perspective, wtf
  • dear diary, why won't anyone make eye contact with me?, meme
  • why not pay people in cocaine and unicorns, conservative outrage with 15 dollar per hour minimum wage
  • in order to be a good gatekeeper, you have to think of your house as a sacred space, not storage space
  • if you don't want to do cool stuff like this at walmart then you probably shouldn't date me
  • the black cat analogy, science, theology, philosophy
  • a ship shipping ship shipping shipping ships


  • illegal immigration is not a new problem, native americans used to call it white people
  • awesome motorcycle and predator helmet
  • the 20 creepiest things you can whisper in someone else's ear when giving them a hug
  • if you think about it the process of signing the birthday song and cutting the cake is extremely satanic
  • game of thrones coloring book, can you hand me the red crayon
  • excuse me while i go light my house on fire, hot firewomen
  • when people ask me how my weekend went
  • 22 wild facts about the human body you probably never thought about


  • #36807

  • stephen colbert... maybe i am not sure honestly how does twitter work? global warming isn't real because i was cold today! Also great news: world hunger is over because I ate today

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stephen colbert... maybe i am not sure honestly how does twitter work? global warming isn't real because i was cold today! Also great news: world hunger is over because I ate today
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