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a large lady in a wheelchair got into the elevator with my 3yr old son and me
he reached out and rubbed her belly
told her when he gets big he wants a big belly too
burglar left bruised by 72 year old boxer
A burglar who broke into a house and threatened a pensioner with a knife got more than he bargained for when the victim turned out to be a retired boxer who left him bruised and bleeding.
so i'm sitting with my son watching tv and he hears he got a text on his phone that he left in the kitchen so he goes and it's a text from me
please bring the chips and a diet pepsi on your way back
in line behind this guy buying condoms and his card just got declined
the little old lady behind me whispered
he got cock blocked by visa
ran into a guy i work with and start chatting
my son stepped between us and looks at the guy
you're not my dad
why are you talking to my mom?
only me and dad can talk to my mom